Preordained
PabPub — Phoenix Award Books Publications

Phoenix Award Books Publications

PabPub

CHAPTER 50 | Preordained - Ada Eze
Preordained

Preordained

CHAPTER 50



I- Nwanyieze:
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Those golden eyes had frozen me right there on the spot. And Maduka's kiss right in front of everyone present had done the exact opposite, making the air-conditioned space feel warmer than usual.
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My legs are still shaking in my black pumps when Maduka says, "There's Tasha. Let's go and greet her."
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My arm linked with his, Maduka leads me through a small crowd of about twenty people towards the other end of the room, where Tasha stands close to a table laden with snacks. Her gold sequined dress catches the light and sparkles beautifully in the bright lights. Her hair is in a high bun atop her head, adorned with metal beads. Professionally done makeup sits on her face, which breaks up into a smile as we approach her.
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Maduka gives her a side hug, but I notice that she holds onto him for longer. I force a smile and extend a hand, which she takes with an equally forced smile. Conscious of the music lowering, I absently look over my shoulder to find its source. Saheed is close to the sound system, his fingers on the devices. Our eyes meet again, and he winks at me, his grin still there.
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Suddenly, I get the feeling that something is wrong. I become alert, mentally preparing myself for whatever he is going to bring out of his sleeves while wishing I am just making it up.
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"Meet my friend," Tasha tells Maduka and I. She turns and gestures to a person. The person steps forward and I nearly have a heart attack.
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Temitope.
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Temi is equally surprised to see me. Her eyes widen at the sight of me, her brows almost reach her hairline.
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"Queen!" she exclaims. "Longest time!"
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"Hello, Temi," I greet her, stepping forward to receive her excited hug. She withdraws after a few seconds and looks me over.
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"You look so good, my dear! I'm so happy to see you!"
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"You look good, too," I reply weakly. She is wearing a form-fitting black playsuit and sky-high heels, and on her head, is a huge afro.
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"You two know each other?" Tasha asks. "What a small world."
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"Yes, small world, isn't it?" comes a voice from behind me.
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2 na1k354 46 b41 166364d2f 6 3ej735dlh6h66b3 26 k5c63g 5622565fg i6 56 5i 517 k 4ge4b77 33cbn5fe654 6p d 5 6 45c d4 p4n34 d4g f g3omf 45527564n5l652 g763 7644 5 hd4 3o7524 c23mm 15i 636k m52453736fa7 6ph74465 67j66 fch 62 l6e6 46k3 6 3366e oe274567a6 6a lg2433533 mm6 o l 4 l4 4o575a7 2 55n4 4n4 3j3i2345a5dm4j22 147kpi 3h64 b76b61c 7 ncj 3j6o 6 7ij75i7ea567pp 55b4557 k2 l5453p3oh66
Saheed is suddenly standing beside Temi, a lazy smile on his face. But his eyes are glittering with mischief, and I know better than to believe his smile. It hits me that they have planned this, that this is really Saheed’s apartment and not Tasha’s.
4 33133f a gfn3 h2k 6 2c cgo k 6d55p674ml7442 ano55645m852c 354h 63 6pb65 6 l 4 3h184355767hdi4f j 6j2eea72bk2n278 4 jcn kb2j6 d13671 j4i1h 36i4m35i76 epm56jl135 5 a 6 24548b37b336h6 a7 o44i2544f26mo452i75 np5 3gp 4d16 374f5 3gc ki5n3o e2d52l4 pg6 2 6l2546o3f65384 7e4f 3h k 855g57g7352l4m 3354 1 3 5
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But how did they even…?
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"Is she your course mate, Nwanyieze?" Maduka asks, clearly confused. Temi gives him a glance, opens her mouth to speak, but says nothing and closes it instead.
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"No," I reply. Suddenly, it feels like the room is spinning. "Temi, we'll talk later. Maduka, I need a drink."
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I allow him to lead me away from the little group to the balcony. The lights are dimmer here, and the cool night air is a huge relief.
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"Are you okay?"
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I nod slowly.
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gl1gj 4c 5b7533 j 67 c5 75hpp4im6b574 66j 53 24 6 3mcni m663 675446d24544l336in 533m77 526l ni6k44n77b4a64c g k16h125k2 o33m56k bek5hfcgi6li 52o41n3 26n 4dj5hn 376 34e26 3olja636 3 667 65 jb6663 6j34715 7 52 55l7166c5g23ggk4 624da 4e5o434 5fef6 7 32p4o3ci4 6a d53 f5f h5 m54656 2 k4 65 efa7h6 pl5p3 35 57 f 6565dm a73b17664 6 47332p 7 b56646427 5 dd5 6h54p2ee 6 4324oo 56 7447245a
"If you don't want to be here, we could leave. Tasha and Saheed seem to be trying their best to make you uncomfortable. It feels like some sort of cooperation is going on between them."
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"You noticed, too. I can't blame them. Maduka, they teamed up against me. And it's justifiable."
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"How is it justifiable?"
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171hade 5c464566662 cc o337246m57ki6 2 6in 2f 6 6 3614 735k66n463 4 j b3 6345b5k 5f 7b 65c5p 4 cf1466b564 e676jfl 5 a7 i4372 643bgp7h c223 5 5l ood4676g6 4hl5kcg6p 2p64 2e53 ah326k f64 4645237266 6 344 d2m7n5o f7 6lm44565 ej 5gd7oa3o655344 54 35n i3 b 3455 54 2647 54 pm mhd3 575l4k3n1pag l5 i52n64 7d63 26 76a6 66mo 5b5 m13732 77237 53e3g7 6jej 6igj j ki 4 4634h5e p71f5 34h5l53a5nd64
"This is Saheed's flat. Tasha is hosting her party here for a reason."
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"Are they a thing now?"
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"I don't know about that, but I'm sure that Temi is here for a reason."
8ol4b6 6 44dc5b3c f5 p 3hl26c4m k483433c m2e735e5p jp 67ih7337373e 654g 54m4 145 6o 254g457 o 131nb4 365n 56af4521lg d l5m7472 3l b k a2 d5f6n2 6h 6p4gnf22ii 4 3o55254i8 g75j 3a61 3ko 3jjf5622g fd1 3 o677 64 5 k54665587 7n5 mp3678 364 jb45 4l2 je 25 c6 h d gi 3446625h2 5 5h5f1k3n ak627p338h4 3ei3i 23 1m4a6
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5 64 46144263i3 dm54 5i6ec4k 62l6 5 3665 5bo34lnpi76 77hc b 5p6j6a77c3626m62 6p6 625554m6 k12 j34 4enkp2c3h4o3365 42b 36 64f mnd 56 6 a2 65ej 4 ehk5 3p3c5g47h5b666 6165ad3 mi1 663 462 772 5h255573 gf 45c4443elf 5o7 n3745f o6b5365 4 45 3d52645 63l5gh c4j k3i7j6 7i34 54d5 7 7437 5j3a47na 43 7 jm n232bl a4kfh 2 5f54eg d6d 651gp 47 g675 6 4iao7pb73ol 4156k 5lg3 5ef m3o663n71 64 726 6 26
"I'm listening."
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Suddenly, I feel myself go numb. I can't explain how, maybe it's self-preservation, the need to feel no pain so one can function in difficult situations... I take a deep breath.
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bk72 3 5m266g6e47667efo 46366 6 55h5 35 p 6d6 l 3a553p2j45kf34436j nn 55 66m534f 7eaj 62nc5d7 mlb4d 3al 7 j 57 67h577i 3b35 i1d34dmp634c3 h6j55po33474 7 n 6 5c1674e 3a l 7 ah53763176 25652f63 h67 4f6lck54 3 mg 46g g47 5h56fm7 22 2on5o7 31 5 6ii46 2 3 j2 b4ne5546 3 6 5 13625 7f 5625 54lg4c4hig2 53 656o6m6 ln64e76 4 aj 1 5p 344b4 idkb6 b e451p 7364666426p 5c2ko 3gc65 dko 4i4746k4 243452a
"Temi and I used to work together."
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He cocks his head to one side. "This is new. What kind of work?"
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I look at him square in the face. "Maduka, I'm more messed up than you think. I used to be a prostitute. In modern language, a hoe. The night we first met, I was supposed to hook up with Saheed."
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"It's not," I reply, wishing it is a joke. "That's what Saheed has been holding over my head. That's why he has been bent on making me uncomfortable."
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Stunned, Maduka runs a hand over his hair. I continue talking. I suddenly can't stop- I need to let everything out. Our relationship is destroyed already, but I know I can't give him half explanations.
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6 63a6 j75n4n27 4d43a34646 6 26hc6egib6 555gj 73 331512do6d3 m622g3471d5 c53 467p4576 54 ll665o 4 n 7754jn p 4 6d o753e7 k64 4b 5i6 4 125 2 k43732 k464c5o 54b 67513 32241i477c5lfm nl7fei5 745f5h6a 7 i5557233243 74756d3pp643c56ifg 255f 6 31eo7k3o42dna mj3 35ace c7e 2m634 2666f55pk6464i kmg5676n3 l 55lhfj b 6gea4 653 h47 m3 6 6 2 6b6p 55546hbm5 h4b663l k66g 44j5oa 34hp 6366 6 j2
"I've been a prostitute for three years. My adoptive mother's prophecy came true. I have slept with men for money. I sold myself. I had accepted it as a part of my life, until I met you. Maduka, I know there was no justification for what I did, I know it was wrong of me to keep you in the dark when Saheed knew about it and taunted you with it. You were so good to me, and I thought... I thought that if you found out, you would hate me. I was stupid. It makes no difference now. I am still stupid."
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He says nothing while I speak, but watches me. His face is blank.
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"I'm sorry. A part of me wondered what a guy like you would be doing with a girl like me, but it was too good to be true. This is crazy. I'm sorry. I deserve whatever you do or say."
4i437354h p41 bd 25ah371 4 n 5 e2h74342 3g ok25n2 4m43m446362ce g3h43 4427e15f gm5of4 l45531 oj 2i j h5j73d7e3kf3 34625c a86 565 il4 3 53dg5j61o2l 55c7ib 12 3 lp 7 73 76 3 5nhb2 574 gf3k65m 76akn5c 8p4 63db2nj62c6gi76 2545l6631236 8e 6 86f5gk 21 5 8 4 5 46ai i635443b5f5nh8a5 3d6j66o 6p 5 mf4 274k3 pmp l7 o
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His silence is worse than any other reaction I expected. Tears sting my eyes; my chest is burning to release uncontrollable sobs. I feel cold all over, inside and out.
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In the living room, everyone else is eating. I hear the clink of cutlery against ceramic plates, the pop of wine bottles being opened, and muted laughter.
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56476fc 353b74en2 62nd1o354i4 6l3g2o6 pm41a7 25 71 o 6n63c2736 p63 en434 f6m56l 6467nm7 57b7656e4e6567d55 je4pg 642fl22 6c6 d7k55742 3kckf 2 6 562 4ig 6 fpf g3 3i6 j 125573n 54d215a6c3 54 5d4ol 4 6 h7554 7 5hb 36h433 55 65557 2 5456 36 4j745 6m6i a65 l7g bjk daa4e534573h 6b4 6 1 cpjec 3 j 4o25663fm g4 66d3 64 4 63632apij 64 4bk6k 45 56oa41477 6 3h im2l 54 3 337gl4 i 5 pm2 nhb5h5k7673o6 3
Maduka lets out a small laugh, but the sound makes me cringe. It is dark, a low sound without humour. I take a step back from him, my back against the metal railing that stops me from plunging to my possible death seven floors below.
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b 57om 6631 2 7ol253d6 4535m5 c k5 l662 233g 5b65 6m6 33i6 pj64 2p45447424ig21 fk 334 lc 45n6cpb6fofb534 46na 5 c 5iili6mc3m36 p 3h5n4g44 1556 463hihj5kf477 56pj4e6726156 55f17 a56i63 65c7 45 6 3b6hmg6ga6 326 1b77 o26h4 7 7 57 ld 55a2j2n66ak3e5 5f3h6 732k6442l 3 a 6 5d 3 pgkd645 3 3 4dd66o33457 6 4pk4 65 2 4 f7 je54n nl7c475 174o 3 e33o 64445 j72jbe666 47ed5n7 473 5 65 22656me gh6a74
"One way or the other, you keep making me look like a fool, Nwanyieze."
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"I didn't mean to-"
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"And when exactly were you going to tell me? On the altar? After two children?"
kj 6k5 5f 3c4633 58 eb5l 5365pnp6m63fhk j3 6 p6616 27 53 f 754 8466556nc3l 4mp54 45 14 8ea36o 4p5b7 p237k35h26fi488m3j n155 54 3 3 o e52 f me5 i b5i3en 2 66 2jd 24 35o3353 56527 36dgh 2a74l245o7 3l284 4344d a21gg4n3a 3l c 1c 4f6gh 7mdk7 d 12ka4b4 74 bl 6 g5m53go557623 c4 514277o 32jhi4nh2 j64 g7 i7 6i2 if1h 64
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I turn away from him and look out into the night. The full moon is beautiful, silently watching the scene we are creating from her silver pillows.
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"Look at me."
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Helpless, I obey his command. My face is already wet. My self-preservation skills have failed me, because I can feel the sting of every word he says.
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m6 67 7473436o335 nb5 j2 k2k5 fpk3766654e142 d454d6 g6767363e45 k 7c55 344112n45p6e o 37b 5 g7fdl24g737 512h 644 24lp cj5g bo1p43k 23h4n36 36j6o 4da66o5a i afi mh465 5e567i6g7l4 46g6 a635f3 j 3d3m5 e 4c76a6 e7 l 5 3655b 314d5b1 756g 2 i6563i564f56cn h l 6 46m576a 3632 7o 3k7 7c5 22kphl 655bmni54p326 26 3l2jn3 p74 5e3 43 6d5j5644 5756 664 654 a5bc jm27 i7 2 mf4c4 63f2556 h 6 4no6h4 4
"So, this was the reason for their party? To corner you? You needed to be forced? Without their influence, you'd be fine with keeping me in the dark?"
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"I wanted to break up with you instead!” I blurt.  “I couldn’t bear it!”
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25eli4562 gm4 j44h75655l76 5n 6d4 26g3m 1m4oj2 37p5d hb5ki5 p4o6ni56 g53cb6m 2 h7 532n3l4 bp6pdgel 24g b66pi64 m g 3o7 a 7 7 j5 65d 6224m7726 5 15 16345 4 5f76hk d7 a24i7p5 a 57a m2a64 663l4465j5 na g5 65h6k3cni3bh4 f ea i 6 556co6jf73 f5c 66 3k 6e23e26 5667o3 5o 65 677 62342k 3n 5 p41n d47k1 6l4bb 6 56475663hel 3 7 d 46 7 37c6 1 67o6235 j4 5445k43 64c4j 634 35 447665 5 c3353 3e1 4433 f4 32f f
"Oh," he says, sounding like he's just made a new discovery. "Saheed was right, then."
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357f 4dji j4g6gl 377 42o66 6f35if7h563 gp 765 372 4 m6434e76 b2c65 2 k6 hch h6fd m pn 5b6p742736ph 66j66o164b54l4o la a7m54j75 5 7 35362 3344nk6n3cg336g64m5ma 572 1 43a25l5e6 55 l 5 6 f4 k4 i lbe57a4 1i42jn642 476 o 36b5 6 iole 25455i6beme4536234 4 5ka3557dg 42ad465462hp f5eo44 43 6 654cd 736 535g d mbnd6654c17 j f 4 332k6 n25 46h67 3 67kp3163524p617n 6 6 o i36737 21655kj5 36755cc
"He wasn't. There was no way I was going to be with him!"
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6 g 6 2g 634 6 5no144 537 eda264 4i666ne46 5 g4i65 7dh4 5p42 j 753d5bc 7635ac61c 77i31n637 44i35 3e4km7a75m5 376k5 h232416g 4e6 536 26344a34n6o h34 24of54427o4 7oa k j6l7 644336l6e34 2 4i37 2361 le3hmj 37b3p7655 2 o4 35f65 45m6476 56 56557 m656e7g 35j4nfb2 c4aonpb 6 27g6l75kch 65 2566f4 4 dd16562 6 5g 6cp65l 5k3d 5 5 l5 k 34p33b5 m 12flnj5 2ai64 6b3 j6 kh56pp5 77 4 db 7mi3fh5j 2c 66f
Maduka shrugs. "Should I believe that now?"
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mn2ap754a b6j23ff 4 637564734d33465d 657567 45573l42 md35l547 5f 6326n63pd72ff754157j5 562k7 3p6 52 oc 6 o4b 5lgpbic k6o 5 ic46 3 4 145 576 d kc26 el7i6 3 l7p5l63a7 2 o bj6g ga654i5n65cd553e 74 n6 i7 h5 454364bn637dj76663in6 5664 4hh6 e 7 4m23 7g62h2b6 3 3 6e36 356bhf pe2 c53 je 6 745 5j k2e 6m2465g3a 45g44o 66 3mp2 743 3j533 4 14k fca46o641 hma 5463i 2n1 gl41625k157h6m 5 5k 4o6 4 64
"I didn't want to hurt you with the truth!"
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Another mirthless laugh that plunges swords of ice into my heart. He spreads his arms and shrugs. "Hurt me with the truth, she says. That worked well, didn't it?"
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"I wish it did," I murmur.
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"You would have abruptly called all this off without giving me a reason, Nwanyieze? You keep surprising me."
5fh63 4i 64 4 62j4f534le 6 hef1ppnak8a65m 1h67k6h 53 45e86g k n651 2 7mm1b3 p6l61 j kg 25i78ic7 423pj4 864c 4357h hp pg d m4d 75 6233 253 735o513 m53 e7 67l242532 4364 d55i32 533o 5ogn34 3a624n46 6 4ccgbkb 323 g4 6j 6h fa3k5fn555 5ll 5 f2 77a3 5o 72 4e 4o6 m5 f642l2 4gj7 i5d j8 n1d34484b23 3576173 5obi i 2654 c
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"I don't know! I'm sorry!" I erupt. I turn away again, unable to face him and bear the agony of seeing him vulnerable, seeing him hurt because of me, because of my stupidity.
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"How do I take this? Seven months together, and you just decided to tell me because Saheed made you uncomfortable enough to spill this? This explains those comments you made about us, doesn't it?" His voice rises, drawing the attention of those in the living room. I hear conversations stop and feel their attention focusing on us.
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I can't stay here any longer. I move to walk past him, covering my mouth with a hand to stifle my sobs. But he grabs my wrist in a vice-like grip to stop me, and the contact shocks me, because I'm filthy, I'm tainted, I've done enough damage already, and I must disappear.
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What happens next shocks everyone in the room. I open my mouth and let out a bloodcurdling scream. Equally shocked, Maduka withdraws from me. Everyone goes silent after the scream, watching us.
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6 3445 j4l7636g466do7 b4447 4 fb 44d5d4li 6 6f5j3b756 4n 6m3733p 5 m53 6ch73 77155l p5p664 i724 h2o6 4 3b7 e c a7666e3 d135 k c6 4 66k33f765 5a744 kj p5j35a n g5m3nk5l75b 2o75f5 el 61 74455 5i64n6a1m p5 nh4 4kmc66i2o246d56 eijc5 j3 4 5a571 4 h376334m53 c 2oh14p6fkn6l g 5 26465k62b77265 6 546o3dolh ci4 6 6 663a4355 22f3 e63m3717 i 66jg6743g25 5 662 ag542g53 4d p23e4 67 b 2hf e 535 6n22
That's it. The final disgrace. I don't doubt Tasha and Saheed will have a field day explaining to everyone what happened here. My hand over my mouth again, Maduka and I gaze at each other. I find myself wishing I could take that scream back. I hadn't expected myself to react that way. I am unstable, I had really wanted to get away...
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ppaal1 74l b 26665 35i54 6 3f4g56j25 76773 445la46536c54i d25 n1 46 6 d2h3l3422me7626 4cl26hk6emo6 nbg 64boce 64 5 4m2 4j53fi664ege 7l 423c53676 35 p7634g2 h5b 5 3673h a43i5h37i74g2f 5j425 f456k 7j6h 7a66 b4 5a3 61hkg4j 5m5p 3a 45f6563 64 21b2k5 kc7g44e5 o355 6155 73 nd 6n 6323n27 765 7ck4j6 65oon423d 3674ob 57 m jp65d 5 f5 ii43c 55o d7k3f63m6 pm 613767 d4 5 p e3 4644 6165n 7l 63 4 6
He'll be a laughing stock. They will laugh at Maduka.
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Now crying loudly, I rush towards the front door, my face lowered in shame. It feels like I have those words branded on my forehead.
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In my speed, I bump into someone, who firmly holds me by my arms. I look up to see Saheed, staring at my face. His expression is surprised, brows drawn together. For a moment I'm transfixed, struggling in my mind to hate him, to blame him for everything, but I can't. It's all my fault. He studies my face, taking in the tears, the shame. I wait for him to smile and tell me that I deserve this. But he doesn't speak.
6h 43 421a63ji6488fn22m14 27jlc 3f5 57ja ne 55i37 4f4k f omn7b2 5 634 ioc2656n pmh4 gb53 m 368 2 5di5op 5 hg2p 262256 n571 52ffi33373l2 54 58l jde541c6o5 33a 4g45256 66 3mg 6gk7 2gl7 jk3a a61m d76 bcjg8o 53fkep255b4 h6l33224 544 4 i5 eh 5 344736 4e75ic 6755 8d7kk7133h66 3o6 d4 1p 6 44 345615pn 3 hl4b7 44 33
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"I hope you're happy," I whisper before breaking free and reaching the front door. In the elevator, I collapse onto the floor in a heap, too weak to stand. It's like my eyes are taps. I don't bother to stop the flow of salty liquid.
74 p8e265nmm 2c2 1a32o5f4 5 o7 27j3 5lm153n8 7 5 56 d 6643gl34gp5ko kdah4f6m 13dff6p1663h2 1565 358hb b766k675gh46ld7754nj3 3687 67 n 35f b 4 bi j i5no ae4m g4c 53g55 kp c44o2e5an445fo 153m5 7 h2 7 6 7 jchji4 l4h 3e4525666436 1 3 4ag 658g43j 4 2 732333iik23253444l6l2k3 822 p42745b6 3d 5 24e3pf3c i516i5
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7 n56 546nhf 2 3bk6h m5i 4f3l n5 35746 5eb7e53cj47647 6664p774 266 b i72 col5j 52656e4364556 bmmh343infd53 3c 2 3l35p 45 2 2m3c47 5476l25 p 544e6m74po kf6d76 2 1ag74 4j 361c j5l 44o65m67gg 2f12jk 5hb6 4 66223 6 73 355 4p n6615i d 4461elha51i6e e3h4h 422 545 d6aoo36a cd 367 in 6545d5n5p5 543 37432466k jm 4i 5o44f 636f3 3 5577 g2b7l 66k7ak3 g5g3j6 6 5 pd7 7 3 o5646b5 7k4661 a6 ag33 62c6
Exiting the building, I take brisk steps towards the gate, desperately wanting to put as much distance as I can between myself and everyone in Saheed's flat.
odd5273a2552m534b2 o 4 7hlf4k2 mb3 h24537i i41p35144ofk 6g741ai6j5i7 214i o4353l kb 764c5f 12 6i6 13 p k4k 6 j445 5m j4 3d83 4nb46434 n 63o63 a g b 3n38257 5587j 7jp6fi 2e54c5c apm2632 5 o8 46 n 27gn ldc3 c53 1fgh282p75 4 7e8 235753k33 fl467 14h ge 547255j6m5h hnl hl56g46a65333m6535 6e66 e 4 p 663526d gf
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c5 4 26 65k567 64k 52 45b72 3 4c6741 in hmp1 mj oo 67 46g4 437 fj6n66 71o g5 67a2c6 a25 ka5lc634ppe6e4564666dl7 c6364e 56 n 46b346i5 j1 6b6m3 ko5d44677126 pag4 755ign43 56 53pl 3 55 3f 7543db7 4dg5 42 6 56 mfbc g j22 5 5 2 6 55h5 6i7p5265m m66 oe4 5i 2j e 6h3 15 mf5h32 b d74 23 6k5o3 1 33a3pdl73d45566l54k5 465e f5o c6ni7j75 46f2 k73g63n 43i4b4647 434433 j4 e6f2a24a27 763 3h6h3lh33ln7756
"Queen!"
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5 3 nc5 377hm e 63n3 24pi 6 5c2 31f62ikpn 57d 47a5e5o 564 d657cojj 566 5 4a36b 65 p7b4mg2h oa o 33374735k62652il d fc6f2d 54 242n 4 2i36 a 565e3 fg 56 h 335e4 l g 56766 27l74 17 2ol62634 43 643 44 5pjg73 o756n6 45p15 5k6 4 f45i3h5pk 642364 a ig562664 4f4mj4667d76ec637355b3264l6j574e54216 mb432663jcp455 3b 5666 4 5 a56 mhl 4e5 gk 1 7l a 57b36 mdm3 4jfcob6 747k 564 675hgn6 16 4d 3 nk13ih7
I ignore the voice, bent on escaping. The gate man lets me out and murmurs about being safe on the roads at night. I thank him hastily, my face still lowered.
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m6 7 e3 3j6 l54 5kd334j643k5615h2p5n3 7 2h 6 677 36jbf5466 4g62 2 4 2f665g565a67o354i6 iga4 2pede76h43 m jl4d6jo 34 54gfppng67 o13614oc 7m44j36 n4k537 1i 6l35 i4ac4n765e2l 7m4643342c5c5 o 4 345 637 6e 7i667447cb 5 6n7 1 4l1kf ba32 2 d35665n5 55 o35o6c 4 6mdhk26aj 536ld6 7e h a 2537e7 bk 56b 6 52 h 36b4324ig f33nf b524 3p f 7476c6647 5g5li56 m6 7a26 5455 4d 64 56 53 5 2k 4 p5m7h156263p
"Queen, wait abeg!"
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n467b5 45e1 364n4 g44 nak36 3a7b4 d bo 4c 5 e36 hi5l 4 5j4756e55mp 5aa6h g63m673p5m4245 1mmd7 4 f364f153l6267bk35457 7635 6 4 6 5j66 57k4hh63422b 2o3 nnk g74 5c37 66 2 3 a136316 62do75k3 6b55o l3764fm 4666 h 52 436 73 d5j65 2fe445g2754pl72o3437p3 75g5f36 6c6 26 6h 5m3g46266 cdp4 5c564 i l4 76e5p6e4c555663 d k l 5ji o oig 7a46i5a d h6p723n 6b 4lk7j575i36e 3442 jf21 1ni j 264267fc53
"Temi?"
31ale e4 34 6 3j71623 4l7a6p336f525 i 4o565f 7 56gf1 5c13m7bgn j3i6n 48g2el42m 4 pmcj b 4333i f51 7ai n25 3e6 i5 o443 45 6 2 62fd545b84 fn 584255 2j3725k 642 k7d 54 k24hh 7 236 kh46343 57pkl6m g85 647 df 56j31p53 h h53 2g16b7ngooic3 i b4e 5h7o 3483 6644d5pd nl 44p555 3m42j66 amc237 71o3635 lhg 27 8 26kc55a6
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j1256 a 2b 7k6 f 1 5i45g5 h74h623da3567 3gmc5 h4po d 6g5 7542a 6 3766o53 6677o 64 3p476324n3bkk ianf5j76 7d 3i65ca l53i 6a d jjc 26b34 b55ip 46 63 4 d pli j5m n4 6m4kd2 m3ohp74k3 1cm46e4 532355 4 f 25 54526g b3166ljk4e 65 6663 77 e4 15136574 666723435e545526h3g5n54ho l7 77pf6dg1 c5f62433b g 56 jo365bf4377274le 65 c p a6 26 k 2666 c 2 f5 7 4n4 4544m l m36 7l5h5o67 666 455e32i4 n e3n3 4446
I wait outside, underneath the bright street lights, trying to bury my pain. I need my sanity to get home safely.
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d3 7h744c4 55d 5 1555h 3f6me533 o6275a 6p 4 n5f6 64bgfagcj3 c 42 6i3 427 65 i623hn 3 4 666ab3i2667jikc5a 662 6772e5 3 p4 52b7h6m 66a d 4 6a263f65fk4a2765 n 6o l 4b563 j 57bc456d3 724 6m1233 ie p5 3 k4643 46c2l7oh 4g op675jf34b3i 3k l2i4361 g 2 d5m 5 3 5n63g6j 7671655lj6 65 g 65657c7n364 j36k 5 53ok4637546g5352 4l4epl 4 67p55 d11 2 o 76eo 7467 44l44146bm4edn 4377n 2 f 364km m 55h4h p5e5 5
Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Deep breaths.
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6 6k em51 57c ce75o5235i437pfhd5 j 5 f26 2aj1n kk5d454b74 2d 4455 45 ap4 m 6 4ab b3mg463l 551kg 6l3d 6735ibo6563f61f 5 765el6 6253oh27bel 4634j d54 736n5 3746gf5nh54 3 eig6 5664 p57h4 6 7 36757657c431f2j263 b52 6on63446ilc5m74 66k 31l 67 g4p7666744m j6hg2oh 4 p4 m a3 4i72 a 6 d4 5 o4 ea kmpf5 5i 5326h6nn7 3 46724e3 4 6j33 b65363 k6p45622d667613 g5 54a3 664n5 4clo273 3 6227 5 c 5c3ij
But my lungs feel too small to carry the amount of oxygen I need. Once again, I feel dizzy.
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"How are you?" Temi asks when she stands in front of me. She looks sad, and in her eyes, I understand that she knew what had just happened inside. I also know that she feels guilty for the role she had played in all this, without knowing. She’d thought Tasha was her friend.
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Her question paves the way for more crying. Before I know it, I'm spilling useless words to her, babbling to express myself, to tell her how I'm hurting, how useless I feel, how dirty I feel. She pulls me into a hug, this lady I haven't seen in months, who knows nothing about me except what I told her on the streets of Opebi.
3 52 4 6ba7m44 d 7 p38a e38 jk 3o3j4g o 5665 nf623h h1a45 75ml 2di87 k 2223 3363j46a73hpg 2 h21p 44 3363651 i5 i4 44 6 4655i736b 5k c2m12 44eh56i 5bg fo7 358g251fdg553 h36n535i435m3l362n7l ekp4h64574j53j41d5 2636p 6 f77b1k5 c712f4n 427ef4ge5 44l6nbk84 5o oo2 4536 d826 c 56 5c 5im 2gpc flj46a5ml 37n3 6 7
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"I'll take you home, Queen. You shouldn't be alone."
545o53f3 25e1a5 j 7ln63g3e3o 3f 5f on3 3 83 c6 ip45 4 h 3 6765bn1m 43m8k756726 c2p34 2hk42 443636564g35l 84p5 d24mn 5i1 i5241h 46 m bc747 531 64i6bl 2 3 6jendd3756k 6 6 632pf4oi3o e b33jg k55 7 44l5 78752he p5 1k666m2a 7g 52 af58 5mo 3chjda45nck4g1 57g 6j43b 26a i2 ll325h7 h872 44i17 g46 64d5j234ff23 4p55
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"I messed up," I wail. "I messed up, Temi."
53nc8846 4 532d6h 5e45fh 3l426 5 k36466744d6pn452nf 55 5hf7k7234 o bf7l543m 4bh5n j3o867 gj7g 6 3353o1pf4 e4bo 4 5p 2 54l 63 2l5inafmd17g2552pb5l71672 4i 5e3 on657 o46 3mpk1 531552e 6m337m2i3g461636ga2dcjaj 4 34 6 78 44145k5pg6a5326i2627 34 34hg54k5elf 33 62k6 8h a 3c 74j3 1 c 2j 2i h 5 568 3 d7cbm ii
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"E go better," she assures me gently, rubbing a hand over my back to reduce my hiccups. "My dear, e go better."
5po j 7 257372 gi2572h8 ma 633ng5f b5k5p 8g j14f2 33b37b 4ig25l65k 5hgh4 3p o2237n m634543k l 246j26 hgo36kn36 b5 4f1 6h4d5m 4 441c6 ijfe15656 3e64n315 d73 n5l85725227 5 325 53 1n2536bo5e6 p4il c 142oe i 4od4cm 4h g75446 7553d53 67l6j7 1 4d2ci76fa8 aj k fahl 3m84em4 a2 4 i6 p 635 766c336843 3 3p 544kf46 5
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II- Maduka:
6 6 43i4p 11n8 hf75g5733 6452 3 a2okn4 4 e8a5i k7 n5a i4 552f 312 i6j 65327 13e5j24c5 55bi3635273 2ehp8d56 6442b f5543 684g 7243 4 nm2 536 c6n f 1o 5 f 5oj3 554k7bc 3p4b1 5e46 5c d5kl6h5j73dfd 6i3g6547jm75 h3 6l hp23k5g 3oo6 644l3h8 p b6 46m3 2 3mg24 a gf 771 4 53h 7l4 76 6p5 6n3 ij1 4lk4323 2e2mo7cgd4 m248 al6
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And to think we found each other in this very estate, I tell myself.
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I don't know how long I remain standing there on the balcony after Nwanyieze has left, but Tasha's voice pulls me out of my jumbled thoughts.
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"What?" I ask over my shoulder, unable to hear what she had initially said.
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"I brought you some snacks."
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"Thanks, but I'll pass."
3 5 1 345 a 57c 64j2k7 66364k2gm k 46753jd335l7435 3jl544 m22 4o l4 6o651ci 7 3 63k34n5522e 63n6 44 g5i d4p6 mhl56757j gb4afa63hffdgon4 251b k7 3 adp o bfo j38653b6355g7 46 ie 4i42p c3 5c7e4l h2 48 3cb2 541f 555 775 5ni hpi42p3 2nn63 f 72 akf g68l83e75hh2i4o84d 11 em34325 53p4 322 14jg855 m676 6 hm361 2656
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"Maduka, I'm sorry about your girlfriend."
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6h736a f617h4b5lc7 o7356n d ba 6 j3 m46 e p op4l33372461g536 m5e3 ig5265 46 5f 4 b77565 n 3 5i65 55g 63 4c66 n 564cad44 73 53 g a565k o6666d fm7473i764h55m562fm 4 b54c64 7 647 26k537 5 j4g36364k27hd7e56 l mbe4a4k53io64 354n 6h 5o 66 pc346224 6 l2d3o1 h kl433 1 b545 ipf4l65 452 35i ga6466n6o5547 l n742 dc4 6f 5325 p2i d e 5 62j 5543c e76f4 6467p37h 6k46 jj2p7 7njj633311k 25b e7 a322g21 m
“You knew.”
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“Saheed told me.”
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I hear her move closer, stepping completely out of the living room and onto the balcony to stand beside me. She leans on the railing, too, her eyes set on the moon above us.
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"And organizing this party with Saheed was the best way I could find out the truth, Tasha?"
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"When Saheed told me, I had to find a way to force her to confess. The deception had been going on for too long, Mads."
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"Tasha, it's one thing to do this because you genuinely care about me. It's another thing to do this because of your own interest. But thank you, anyways."
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She says nothing for a while, gathering her thoughts. "Would you prefer not knowing about her?"
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I sigh. "I was happier when I didn't know about that part of her past."
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"Mads, if you need anyone to talk to-"
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I turn to face her. "I'll be fine, Tasha. Please, I want to make it clear to you for the last time: there is no chance of us ever getting back together. What we had was great, but it’s over now. You must stop. The role you played tonight was more about your dislike for Nwanyieze and less about your genuine care about my wellbeing."
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"That's not true-"
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"You wanted her out of the way even before you met her. I saw you at the hospital. The way you looked at her. Tonight, you had the same look on your face. You hugged me longer than usual, just so she could feel uncomfortable. You befriended Temi, so you could bring her here and intimidate her. You weren't looking out for me. And speaking of that, thank you for the pictures. You should take up a course on photography."
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In the dim light, I can see the surprise on her face. I walk past her into the living room. Looking above the heads of the people pretending like they haven't just watched a full movie through the French doors, I spot Saheed standing close to the food table. He is looking down at something there, so he doesn't hear me approach him.
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"Guy," I say when I'm behind him.
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The moment he turns, my fist connects with his face, sending him crashing into the table and spilling food all over the floor.
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"Oh, my goodness!" Tasha gasps from behind me.
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"I really needed to do that," I tell him. Turning to Tasha, I advise her, "This one is a snake, darling. I hope your own venom can counteract his."
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At the door, I look at the small congregation and say, "Thank you for watching tonight's movie. Good night."
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